The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Let's paint friendship bongs
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
