i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize