You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
