the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
