i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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