I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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