Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
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