thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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