Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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