this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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