If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
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