I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
There was a lot of him and a little penis
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
