i was born a porn star she said
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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