obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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