no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize