it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
