Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
