i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Randomize
