In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
