Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize
