chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
All I want is dick and wine.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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