take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Randomize
