Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
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