I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Randomize
