I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
