I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
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