What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Just high enough for therapy.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
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