hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
