ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
