Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I'm both gender and math confused
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
