Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
As shirtless as possible
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
