The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
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