Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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