? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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