I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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