But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
