I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
i just google imaged poop.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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