i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Randomize
