You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
