I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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