It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Randomize
