Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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