is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Randomize
