He disabled his match.com account in front of me
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
