I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
