im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Apparently you make a good broom.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
