So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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