quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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