I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
