i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
